I don't think we are ever prepared for the kinds of demands that parenting puts on us, at least I had NO idea. Sure people say its hard, but do you really believe them or have a sense of what that means?
This morning my son was pushing it. He was stalling and kept demanding one more thing before we left the house. I knew I needed to hold the line. I did. He melted down and got SO angry. I was able to, this time, watch him scream and yell. I then could feel and remember how I felt the very same way when I was a child. IN A RAGE. I hated my parents because I thought they made me feel this inside. What a gift it was to let him have the emotion and to remember myself in his shoes.
The truth is, its kind of scary to feel all that. When we are abandoned or shamed about our emotions they head underground to a safe albeit inaccessible place. We need access to our feelings.
I felt proud after this. I did it. Good job Mama. He collapsed into my arms after maybe a minute of raging. He returned to himself, spent his fury.
I have to credit the regular emails from Dr. Laura Markham of Aha! Parenting for this skill. I have cultivated it for years. Every week she guides me and encourages me to always choose love. Thank you Dr. Laura!
This morning my son was pushing it. He was stalling and kept demanding one more thing before we left the house. I knew I needed to hold the line. I did. He melted down and got SO angry. I was able to, this time, watch him scream and yell. I then could feel and remember how I felt the very same way when I was a child. IN A RAGE. I hated my parents because I thought they made me feel this inside. What a gift it was to let him have the emotion and to remember myself in his shoes.
The truth is, its kind of scary to feel all that. When we are abandoned or shamed about our emotions they head underground to a safe albeit inaccessible place. We need access to our feelings.
I felt proud after this. I did it. Good job Mama. He collapsed into my arms after maybe a minute of raging. He returned to himself, spent his fury.
I have to credit the regular emails from Dr. Laura Markham of Aha! Parenting for this skill. I have cultivated it for years. Every week she guides me and encourages me to always choose love. Thank you Dr. Laura!
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