Question the voice that says “I’m not ready yet.” I know, I know. Because you are so brilliant and have such high standards, you see every way that you could be more qualified. You notice every part of your idea that is not perfected yet. While you are waiting to be ready, gathering more experience, sitting on your ideas, our friends referenced in rule five are being anointed industry visionaries, getting raises, and seeing their ideas come to life in the world. They are no more ready than you, and perhaps less. Jump in the sandbox now, and start playing full out. Find out just how ready you are. Tara Mohr
What does showing up in your life mean?
And whose standards do we hold ourselves to that are unrealistic for a life well-lived?
Where can you let yourself off the hook?
I am reading Tara Mohr's book Playing Big and it is full of compassionately voiced concepts and practices she has learned in helping women play bigger and offer their gifts to the world. One self-defeating concept she illuminates dovetails with this quote nicely--never leaving the white board. That means we will plan, design, devise on the white board instead of taking the risk to step out into a real world, a face to face world. I am guilty of that. And I want to play bigger in my life.
What do you notice about showing up in your life? What do you notice about getting it together? Does it stop you from greeting the world with your gifts?
There is nothing sweeter than holding the soft innocent hand of your child.
Together. Simple. Pleasure.
I am hoping those days don't end, but they might.
Mothers hold their children's hands for a short while, but their hearts forever. -ergens gelezen
Questions to Ask Yourself
I don't think we are ever prepared for the kinds of demands that parenting puts on us, at least I had NO idea. Sure people say its hard, but do you really believe them or have a sense of what that means?
This morning my son was pushing it. He was stalling and kept demanding one more thing before we left the house. I knew I needed to hold the line. I did. He melted down and got SO angry. I was able to, this time, watch him scream and yell. I then could feel and remember how I felt the very same way when I was a child. IN A RAGE. I hated my parents because I thought they made me feel this inside. What a gift it was to let him have the emotion and to remember myself in his shoes.
The truth is, its kind of scary to feel all that. When we are abandoned or shamed about our emotions they head underground to a safe albeit inaccessible place. We need access to our feelings.
I felt proud after this. I did it. Good job Mama. He collapsed into my arms after maybe a minute of raging. He returned to himself, spent his fury.
I have to credit the regular emails from Dr. Laura Markham of Aha! Parenting for this skill. I have cultivated it for years. Every week she guides me and encourages me to always choose love. Thank you Dr. Laura!
The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to go sharper.
The beauty of children is that they are so fresh and can open our eyes to the everyday magic all around us. If we can slow down enough, they can open our eyes too!
What magic has your child helped you see?
Love is the Only Truth
There is an intersection that holds me at the center. The past and future generation behind and in front of me. I am suspended in the present. The pinpoint in time I rest on is apparent. Past, present, future converge in me.
I feel my grief at having had needs as a child. The feelings passed on to me surface. How can I have needs? I should be ashamed of myself, how dare I? My son should be ashamed of himself. Really? No. Absolutely not. I made myself wrong because my parents made me wrong because their parents made them wrong.
So here come the waves of grief, the understanding that I wasn’t wrong, the letting go of unrealistic expectations of myself. Expressed grief is like a salve for the past. The waves wash over my heart and make the truth apparent. Love is the only truth.
The access to the ocean of love is bigger today. The feelings my son is allowed to have have more space because I have space for myself.
This is the greatest gift in parenting.
You don't have to match unless you want to.